Dronfield

Dronfield Wae Aye

Dronfield Wae Aye

Dronfield’s best-loved print publication, The Dronfield Eye, read by dozens and enjoyed by some, is allegedly planning to release an edition written entirely in Newcastle’s ‘Geordie’ dialect.

The decision apparently comes off the back of the Geordie accent’s recent triumph in the UK’s Most Loved Accent poll run by top sociolinguists at The University of Unstone, winning the award for Friendliest Accent, Most Likely To Become A Celebrity Accent, as well as taking home the overall title of Most Loved Accent. Couple this success with the complete inability to avoid people talking about Geordie Shore, no matter how terrible the show is, and The Dronfield Eye’s plan seems like a fool-proof way to boost readership, engage with audiences under 60 and generally exploit the current popularity of all things Geordie.

However, some critics have slammed the idea, raising the extremely valid point that the Geordie accent is about as relevant to the people of Dronfield as Dave Berry is to today’s music industry. Instead, they proposed that The Dronfield Eye should write an edition in pure Dronfield dialect, only to later realise that Dronfield lacks absolutely anything interesting in terms of a localised language variety. ‘Even the standard RP has some distinctive phonological features, Dronfield has nothing, it’s the most unexceptional accent and dialect, not only in the UK but in all of the English-speaking world,’ commented Dr Lynne Gwiste of Unstone’s Department of Phonological Studies. So, Geordie it is then.

We don’t know yet when the Dronfield Wae Aye will appear in our letterboxes, but here at Dronfield Digital we’ve speculated on how the content of a special Christmas edition might look.

  • Eeeey man, myek sure yous buy sum cur’ains an tha, they meks perfect pressies, like.

[New range of curtains now in stock at local furnishing store. Order now in time for Christmas.]

  • Remember when yous are all gettin bladdered an tashin on wi strangers like tha Chrissmas is all aboot tha little Bairn Jesus.

[Enjoy the festive season this year and remember the true Christian values of the holiday.]

  • Wae aye man, keep yer neb aht a wor lass’s cookin, nowt worse’n when she kizzens the turkey coz she were busy avin er natter aboot best way t’ mash tatties wi yous lot.

[Share the stress of cooking Christmas Dinner by getting the whole family involved. But don’t forget about the turkey in the oven while you’re all having such fun!]

 

 

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